Atlanta Braves hurler Derek Lowe is puzzled: while the Braves sometime ace remains an effective starter against much of the National League (even while sporting a so-so 11-11 record), he can’t seem to beat the Nats. The last time Lowe beat the Anacostia Nine was last August, but he’s been winless against the Nats Nine since, a record of futility that the imposing righthander (6-5, 230) has trouble squaring with Washington’s losing record. “I can’t remember the last time that I beat the Nationals,” Lowe said in the wake of the Tomahawks’ 6-2 loss to the Nationals on Thursday. “They’ve given me a rough time.” But it was not so much Lowe’s pitching (seven innings with 6 hits), as it was a combination of the pitching from Washington starter John Lannan (who went a strong 5.1) and a no-hits bullpen that caused the Braves fits. When coupled with big hits from Michael Morse and Willie Harris, the Nats looked unstoppable, picking up a much-needed win (that’s number 52 on the season). The Nats now head into Philadelphia, where they’ll face the red-hot Ashburns.

The Quicker Picker Upper: The inevitable has happened in Chicago, with Cubs’ General Manager Jim Hendry cleaning out the stables of the sinking-like-a-stone North Side Drama Queens. The trade of the ever-popular Ryan Theriot and Ted Lilly (their most effective starter) to Los Angeles at the trade deadline was followed by the careless unloading of steady but unimpressive Mike Fontenot to the McCoveys. Now, in what can only be considered an official waving of the white flag, the Cubs have unloaded their most productive, good-glove-and-bat first baseman Derrek Lee, who went to the Braves for three maybes. The successive trades mark a generational shift in the future of the Cubs, as the front office has apparently decided that Theriot-Lilly-Fontenot-Lee powerhouse of just a few years ago has gotten too old and too mediocre to bring a pennant (or World Series championship) to the Windy City. The issue is not whether the trades should have been made, but why they weren’t made earlier. “None of us thought this was going to happen this year. We really didn’t,” Hendry said in annoucing the trade of Lee. ”It will be good for (Lee) and from that regard, I’m happy for him. But the overall situation we’re in kind of makes us all stumble between miserable and sad every day.”

Miserable? Sad? The Cubs just dropped four straight to the Padres and are a worse team than the Nats — much worse. So while Cubs fans might have been expected to be marching on Wrigley in protest at Lee’s departure, the Cubs blogosphere has viewed the trade as inevitable — and necessary. Al Yellon over at Bleed Cubbie Blue probably said it best, mixing respect for Lee with a sighing confirmation that the Cubs’ future did not include the impressive first baseman. “I salute D-Lee for his classy demeanor on and off the field,” Yellon wrote. “Some here complain that he wasn’t demonstrative enough on the field and though he was seen as a team leader, many wanted him to ‘show it’ more, though I’m not quite sure how you do that.” While Cubs fans remain oddly contemplative (there’s usually lynching parties at this point) the scapegoating of Hendry (well, perhaps for good reason) and the coaching staff has begun.

That’s probably unnecessary. The imminent departure of Lou Piniella is bound to be followed by the displacement of pitching coach Larry Rothschild, as the Ricketts’ family retools to a younger staff that reflects a younger team. Is there reason for hope? Yes. And no. The Cubs are able to field one of the game’s best young outfielders in Tyler Colvin and one of its best young shortstops in Starlin Castro. But the team’s starting pitching is a catastrophe — with few young phenoms coming up in the minors. Which is why Hendry is trading his front line for a few maybes, all of them arms. Which means that the Cubs new rotation and bullpen (with some exceptions) is now filled with a gaggle of no-names, like Thomas Diamond, Justin Berg, Mitch Atkins, Marcos Mateo and James Russell — each of these guys with (as they say) “a tremendous upside.” Roughly translation: we might, or might not, ever hear of them again.

The Washington Nationals not only won their first game of the season, they have apparently found their closer. Clinging to a 6-5 lead heading into the ninth, the Nats brought in Matt Capps, their new free agent closer. After a tough season in Pittsburgh (57 games, 5.80 ERA), the Georgia fireballer was looking for redemption. At least for the first two Phillies’ batters in the ninth, he didn’t get it: as Nats’ fans chewed their nails, Phillies’ second sacker Chase Utley greeted Capps with a double and Ryan Howard was walked intentionally. For Washington’s long-suffering fans, this looked like a replay of ’09 — when designated closer Joel Hanrahan blew successive saves and sunk the Nats’ early season hopes. But Capps proved equal to the task, getting Jayson Werth on a long fly out (Nyjer Morgan tracked the ball down in the gap), Raul Ibanez on a short sky-out (to left fielder Willie Harris — who held Utley at third) and Shane Victorino on a pop-up to shortstop Cristian Guzman.

Capps pumped his fist in notching the Nats first victory, and was ebullient after the game:”To go through that lineup, you have to feel good about it,” Capps noted. “It was a great feeling when Guzman caught the ball because I knew it wasn’t hit well to do any damage. Nyjer did a great job on that ball Werth hit. Nyjer getting that ball saved the game.” Capps admitted that he felt the pressure: “There were a few more nerves going out in that save situation. Everything felt good today.” He added: “I threw the ball well. Today felt good.” The win also felt good for Nats’ skipper Jim Riggleman. “As we saw [reliever Brian] Bruney battle there in the eighth, and the way Capps was firing in the ninth, it was really encouraging to see because our pitching has to come together,” he said. “It’s making strides. It’s coming together. When it does, it’s going to give us a chance.” The Nats head to New York for a series against the Mets.

That Other NL Rookie: While all eyes are focused on the anointed NL Rookie of the Year — Atlanta’s bopper-to-be Jason Heyward — the Cubs are now starting to feature a phenom of their own. The can’t miss Cubbie is Tyler Colvin, a former Clemson Tiger draft pick, who would have won a job out of Spring Training if the Cubs outfield wasn’t so crowded. On Thursday, the Cubs won their first game of the season — and Colvin’s bat was all they needed. Colvin’s solo shot in the second inning gave the Cubbies a 1-0 lead, propelling the sluggies to a 2-0 shutout in Atlanta. There’s surely more to come. Colvin channeled Crash Davis after the game, giving an “aw shucks” answer to a question about how he prepares for a game now that he’s in The Show — “As long as I stick with my routine, I’ll be fine,” he said. The Cubs will never suffer from a power outage (and they never have): their problem is pitching (and always was). But with Colvin pushing from the bench, the North Side Drama Queens are full-up in the outfield. Don’t expect it to stay that way. Sooner or later, Sweet Lou will have to play Colvin every day — and someone will have to go.

One game a season does not make: and that’s a damn good thing. If the Nats loss at home during their opener is any indication, then fans of the Anacostia Nine are in for a long season. Starter John Lannan was shakey, the bullpen (with the lone exception of Jesse English) seemed to revert to last year’s form, and Nats’ batters just couldn’t get around on Roy “Doc” Halladay. At least in the case of Halladay that’s no surprise. The former Blue Jay was masterful in seven complete innings of work, while Lannan lasted just three-and-two-thirds.”Philly is a tough team to stop once they get the momentum,” Lannan said after the game. “The momentum kept on going, and I couldn’t stop it. I felt good at first, it’s just that the fourth inning got me. I felt good the first three innings. I wanted to have a different story for Opening Day. It’s the first game of many, and I’m not going to let it tell the story for this whole season.”

Aside from the stadium-bulging and excited home town crowd (with Phillies’ fans sprinkled liberally throughout) — and the ceremonies surrounding the actual game — the day was only marginally memorable. It actually began the night before with Washington’s obsession (and the trade of a major player from that other game), and continued into the early afternoon, with the sports media’s focus on America’s current sports megalomaniac. In Boston and New York (and Chicago, Anaheim and Atlanta), those kinds of stories would be footnotes: a sure sign that Washington will need a winner to command the kind of loyalties enjoyed by the “Nation,” the “Empire” and the “Halos.” We’ll get there, but if Monday is any indication, it probably won’t be this year.

The good news is that with the opener out of the way, Nats’ fans can now focus on the real story: whether the bullpen will show appreciable improvement over ’09 (at least Jesse English looks good), whether the platoon in right field will really work (it won’t), whether Ian Desmond is “the answer” at short (we won’t know for awhile), and whether the starting five (sans Strasburg, at least for now), can reel off some wins.

Those Are The Headlines, Now For The Details: Bad news for Cubs fans — Carlos Zambrano is still Carlos Zambrano. The Venezuelan rolling pin made Lannan look like an ace. The “Big Z” gave up two homers, hit a batter and made a throwing error as the Sluggies fell to the Chops 16-5. At least he didn’t destroy the water cooler. Lou said that he never imagined that Chicago would give up 16 runs on Opening Day. It was God-awful. Atlanta’s version of “the real deal” hit a dinger in his first at bat and the boys over at “Baseball Tonight” just couldn’t stop talking about it. They said (as ESPN rolled video) that Henry Aaron has “passed the mantle” to a new slugger — new Atlanta outfielder Jason Heyward. Well, maybe. But it might be a little early . . .

John Kruk on Placido Polanco: “He’s the best number two hitter in baseball,” he said, “with the exception of Derek Jeter, who bats first” . . . Peter Gammons is fitting in nicely in his new gig, as an on-air commentator for the MLB Network, but he’s still a homer for his favorite team — and player. That said, he still issues some thoughtful insights. Last night Gammons described Frank Robinson as “the most underrated great player” of his era; that’s a new and interesting baseball category that demands some thinking. Gammons’ new category might, for instance, include the overlooked Mickey Vernon — who’s hardly rated at all. Gammons added that Robinson was overawed by the attention given to Willie Mays and Hank Aaron. Yeah, that’s right. And Mickey Mantle.

MLB Trade Rumors is reporting that the Nats and Cubs have been in talks about a prospective trade that would bring Cubbie Kosuke Fukudome to Washington — though the reports add that the talks have not been “particularly substantive.” The Nats have apparently also floated the possibility of trading for the Brewers’ Corey Hart or the Rays’ B.J. Upton. The report, which originated with MASN’s Ben Goessling, reflects a distinct discomfort in Washington’s front office with the right field platoon of Willie Harris and Willy Taveras — players that would provide plenty of defense and speed, but not a whole lot of pop at the plate. From our perspective, a trade for Hart is more likely than a trade for Fukudome (the Brewers are unhappy with Hart’s lack of production), while Tampa is unlikely to trade Upton unless they decide, probably at midseason, that they can’t win with him.

That said, of the three players mentioned, Fukudome is the most intriguing. The Cubs had high hopes for the former star of the Chunichi Dragons (“the pride of Nagoya”) and spent oodles to get him — some $48 million over four years (with $26.5 remaining over the next two years). That’s a lot of money for a guy who hit .259 with 11 home runs in 2009. The plan for 2010 was to cut into Fukudome’s at-bats against lefties (just .242) by platooning him with former Buc and Yankee Xavier Nady (that is, Xavier Clifford Nady VI), whose kinky elbow is still kinky. But trading “The Fook” (a nickname that originated this year with Lou Piniella), would allow Cubs phenom Tyler Colvin to prove that he is, in fact, the next big thing in Chicago. And he probably is.

The question, of course, is what would Washington have to give up to get a player like Fukudome — and would they be willing to pay him the money he’s owed? The answers are: ”a pitcher” and “it depends.” The name most often mentioned in these rumors, albeit by MLBTR commenters, is Craig Stammen. Stammen’s status as a solid three or four starter has been steadily rising and he’s clearly that other good young starter that the Nats need to complement Lannan and Strasburg. The Cubs could use a starter (who couldn’t?), but would more likely attempt to land another arm for the bullpen. The Cubbies bullpen is shakey, and was a year-long problem in the 2009 campaign.

It’s all spit-wadding at this point, but my bet is that if the Cubbies have their eye on anyone at all, they have their eye on Tyler Clippard, whose seventh and eighth inning heroics in Washington last year showed that he’s in The Bigs to stay. But Clippard might not be enough to land the high-profile Fukudome, which means that the Nats would have to agree to pay a good part of Kos-K’s obese contract, or throw in another arm to seal the deal. Of course, there’s more to the calculation: Fukudome is an absolutely legit big leaguer, has worn out his welcome in Chicago, is still searching for a way to hit something close to .300 — and would put fans in the seats at Nats Park. People would pay to see Kos-K play. Yeah, I agree: it would be tough for Mike Rizzo to part with a pitcher like Stammen, whose upside is only now becoming apparent. But it would be much less difficult (and after last year’s adventure in the eighth inning, I say this with a lot of hesitation) to deal someone like Clippard – and maybe a prospect or two. And why not? Willie and Willy are fine players with lots of speed, but they’re a temporary fix and are simply not going to get it done at the plate. And we all know it. Don’t we?