The Washington Nationals bombarded the Houston Astros on Monday, wracking up 14 runs on 14 hits, and registering the biggest inning in Nats history. Nyjer Morgan, batting second, went 3-4 in breaking out of a May slump, while Adam Dunn and Ryan Zimmerman each had four RBIs. But the Nats-Astros tilt was not only notable for the fireworks provided by Washington’s bats. In the third inning, Houston ace Roy Oswalt was ejected from the game by home plate umpire Bill Hohn, whom Oswalt clearly believed was not giving him an outside strike. Oswalt complained, confronted Hohn, and was tossed. The Nats were pleased with Oswalt’s departure (even though they seemed to be hitting him) and jumped on the Astros’ bullpen.

Oswalt argued his innocence after the Nats win. “I was upset I missed with a pitch a little bit off the plate and was actually talking to myself on the mound,” Oswalt said. “I wasn’t even looking his way, and when I turned around, he was pointing at me and saying something about, ‘Are you going to keep your mouth shut?’ I couldn’t really tell what he said. I told him I wasn’t talking to him and he kept on talking, so I told him again I wasn’t talking to him, and he threw me out.” Houston manager Brad Mills put himself between Oswalt and Hohn, but the signal for Oswalt’s ejection had already come. Hohn’s finger-in-the-air toss came after Adam Dunn had put an extra base knock into right-center field off a pitch that Oswalt seemed to groove after Hohn had called successive balls on his corner pitches. “That’s on you,” Oswalt mouthed to Hohn as Josh Willingham came to the plate.

Is This The Year of the Umpire? Oswalt’s ejection over called balls and strikes highlighted the increasing noise over the strike zone in major league baseball. Roy Halladay’s perfect game against the Marlins on Saturday featured a strike zone that gave the Phillies’ ace an outside strike — not nearly as tight as Hohn’s zone with Oswalt in Houston on Monday. The Marlins refused to talk about “the Halladay strike zone” after the game (“I don’t want to talk about the strike zone, because that’s a discredit to what he did,” Fish regular Chris Coghlan said), but they were clearly upset about some of the calls — on 3-1 and 3-2 counts. Strangely the strike zone seemed incredibly small in April — perhaps an attempt to inject some offense into the game in the post-steroid era — before loosening up through all of May.

A family member (here he is, honest) theorizes that the endless use of slo-mo, super slo-mo and the strike zone box featured in nearly all MLB broadcasts (on Nats broadcasts it’s the “MASN HD Pitch Track”), has so irritated the umpires that they are in revolt. The result of the revolt is a wider strike zone, faster games and punch and judy hit-the-opposite-way games. The theory is more than just an idea. In March, a group of baseball experts convened by USA Today (that included players, umpires and managers), took on the strike zone box used by color commentators. Veteran ump Steve Palermo was the most outspoken; he called the graphic phony and inaccurate. “They put up the same box for Freddie Patek and Dave Winfield,” Palermo said. “You telling me those two strike zones are the same? I don’t think so. Not at 6-foot-6 and 5-foot-4. They should say at the bottom of the screen, ‘This is for entertainment purposes only.’ ” The graphic has led to endless second guessing by managers, fans and viewers of umpire calls. “I hate that damn box on TV. Why don’t they eliminate that?” super scout Gary Hughes queries.

If MLB’s umpires are in revolt, they’re likely led by Joe West, the president of the World Umpires Association and the spiritual leader of the fed up and huddled umpire masses. West would be an odd choice for a revolutionary leader: he’s controversial, holds grudges and spends a lot of time off the field promoting his country western CD and hobnobbing with celebrities. Earlier in the season, West criticized the Red Sox and Yankees for their habit of playing interminable games, calling the two teams “pathetic and embarrassing.” The comment sparked a firestorm of comment. But West’s complaint was hardly new: it has been made often by baseball insiders (and outsiders), who point to the Red Sox and Yankees as arrogant flouters of Commissioner Bud Selig’s wish to speed up the game. “Everybody else gets screwed but those two teams,” Angels outfielder Torii Hunter says. Steve Palermo went public with his own anger back in March, noting that when Red Sox closer Jonathan Papelbon was disciplined for throwing extra pitches in the bullpen warm-up session after being summoned to the mound, he ripped up the disciplinary notice in front of a group of reporters. “You know what?” Palermo says. “If somebody acts up, whack them. I’m talking about $50,000. And then $100,000. And then $200,000. You usually get the attention after the $100,000 mark.”

If there’s an umpire revolt in major league baseball, it’s likely to reach a boiling point this week, when Bud Selig and crew may decide to reprimand Joe West — and either fine or suspend him — for allegedly recruiting reporters to his side in the length of games controversy. West is also under fire for calling two balks on White Sox pitcher Mark Buehrle and ejecting him, and then doing the same with Pale Hose manager Ozzie Guillen. Now, granted, West comes off as a jerk and his “Cowboy” Joe West pose flies in the face of one of the game’s most sacred unwritten rules — that umps should be invisible. But in spite of this, West seems to be making a point that has nothing to do with his comments on the length of game controversy or his dust-up with the South Siders. And it’s a point that every umpire in the MLB would support: that the strike zone is what the umps say it is (that’s what it says in the rules) and . . . and as soon as you step on the field, the umps are in charge. It can’t be any other way and it hasn’t been for more than one hundred years. Then too, let’s get serious: it’s not as if Roy Halladay is Danny Cabrera. You don’t like the strike zone? Well, get a clue: swing the bat. Like the Nats did yesterday in Houston.

Nyjer Morgan led off Tuesday’s game with a home run and the Nats then added two more (on round-trippers by Adam Dunn and Cristian Guzman) to take the second of four games from the Milwaukee Brewers, 8-2. Morgan continues to swing the hot bat — despite predictions that he will eventually cool off. Morgan seems to have found his role in Washington: an overachieving sparkplug on an underachieving team, playing in a position usually reserved for power hitters and superstars. Collin Balester pitched well, if not spectacularly, to take the win: six complete innings with five hits, no walks and three strikeouts. Balester’s outing now seems standard for Nats’ starters: low strikeouts but few walks with fastballs in the low 90s. Jason Bergman, Logan Kensing and Ron Vallone went the rest of the way, holding the beer makers to just one hit over three innings. The win is the Nats fourth in a row.

Chico Harlan over at Nationals Journal gives a rundown of what the Nats might or might not do with a little over 24 hours to go until the trade deadline. The front line of Willingham, Dunn and Johnson are hitting well in July and the team is performing — and with the McCoveys and Red Sox having traded for a first baseman, the market for Nick Johnson may be dry. Harlan has published an interesting exchange with reliever Joe Beimel, who praises Jim Riggleman for instilling a new work ethic in the clubhouse. “It’s been fun coming to the field the last couple weeks,” Beimel said. “Since Riggleman took over, I think you’ve seen an attitude change in the clubhouse. Guys recognize they have to come in early and do work to get better, and they’ve been doing that. It’s been actually pretty fun. It’s been fun to come here, be in every game, and even win a few.” Beimel is rumored to be on the radar of the North Side Drama Queens, who are in talks with the Ahoys about reliever John Grabow. If the Cubs don’t get Grabow, they may work hard to get Beimel, who’s been solid out of the pen for the Nats. Wouldn’t it be nice for Mike Rizzo to get someone who could fill-in up the middle (and push the badly slumping Alberto Gonzalez)? Someone like say . . . Mike Fontenot, who is now being platooned with newly acquired Jeff Baker. Truth is, the Cubs would never part with him for Beimel, and Lou loves Fontenot, despite the former LSU star’s struggles at the plate.

Is Joe Headed to the Cubs?

A Rose By Any Other Name: During the Nats’ series with the Mets, MASN analyst Rob Dibble referred to a heater that fooled a Chokes’ batter as a “Blue Bayou.” As in — “that one blew by you.” I immediately sprinted to that handy tome on baseball phrases, but couldn’t locate Dibble’s reference. It wasn’t there. ‘Aha,’ I thought. ’A crack in the otherwise rock solid ediface of Dickson baseball expertise.’ I wrote to the author yesterday (now officially promoted to the position of “droog”) to issue a soft comeuppance. The author informed me that a “Blue Bayou” (fastball) is referenced in his dictionary as a “Linda Ronstadt” — who sang, ah, “Blue Bayou.” Paul then referenced a “Peggy Lee fastball” – ”Is that all there is?” The “Peggy Lee” was the specialty of Tug McGraw, who threw his heater and then took about 10 mph off of it . . . But having promoted Paul I am now going to demote him (from “droog” to just plain old “friend”) for reminding me that my reference to a “Bugs Bunny change-up” in a previous post was incorrect. It is not “Bugs” who swings at the pitch, but who delivers it. Well, okay. But I don’t count that as a strikeout; it’s more like a pop-up. So now, lemmeaskya, how many other baseball blogs can boast a pic of Linda Ronstadt?

Down On Half Street: Cole Hamels appears to be all the way back. The former dominant lefty faced off against the Showboats’ Dan Heren last night and, with the help of an umping call on a scorcher down the rightfield line (which should have been called foul), tamed the D-Backs. Hamels’ went eight innings and gave up only four hits . . . The Cubs and Astros have been hit by a series of unforseen injuries. Cubs’ starter Ted Lilly is on the DL after having knee surgery and “Stros” stopper Roy Oswalt tweaked his back during the Houston nine’s win against the Slugs . . . Mark Buehrle continues to dominate. Last night he set a major league record for consecutive outs — with 45 — shattering the record held by teammate Bobby Jenks and former San Francisco starter and reliever Jim Barr. While his statistics don’t show it, Barr was one hell of a pitcher. For a time in the early 1970s, his control was among the best in baseball. I remember watching him against Pittsburgh in 1973 and was stunned by his pin-point command. I could have sworn, then, that he would develop into the best pitcher in the game. It was not to be. Barr’s best year was 1974; he was 13-9 and threw eleven complete games and five shutouts. Barr developed arm problems in 1980 and was out of baseball in 1983. He has been pitching coach with the Sacramento State University Hornets since 1995.

The St. Louis Cardinals dominated the Washington Nationals in a rain-shortened contest at Nationals Park. The six inning 4-1 loss snapped the Nats’ two game winning streak in a game that was postponed on May 3. Collin Balester, pitching for the injured Jordan Zimmermann (placed on the 15 day disabled list for precautionary reasons), lasted just three innings before being relieved by a surprisingly ineffective Tyler Clippard. Clippard, who had pitched well in three previous relief appearances, gave up three hits and walked two in two innings, before giving way to Ron Villone. Surprisingly, the Nats outhit the Cardinals, 8-6, but were only able to account for one run before the game was called. The game will go into the books as a six inning St. Louis win. The game was delayed twice, for two hours and forty-six minutes, before being ended. Redbirds’ starter Adam Wainwright posted his eleventh win against six losses.

Rained Out At Nats Park (AP Photo/Pablo Martinez Monsivais)

More On Buehrle’s Masterpiece: MLB Network commentators parsed White Sox pitcher Mark Buehrle’s perfect game, estimating that he faced twenty-seven Tampa Bay Rays’ batters in 32 minutes in a game that lasted a total of two hours and three minutes. That means that the Rays were on the field nearly three times as long as the Pale Hose. Buehrle is among the league’s fastest workers on the mound. In Thursday’s game he threw first pitch strikes nearly 70 percent of the time. Normally a flyball pitcher, Buehrle mixed his fastball with his change-up, registering eleven groundouts and ten flyouts. He threw 116 pitches, 76 of them for strikes and faced nine batters, each of them three times. The lefthanded Buehrle was particularly effective in spotting his pitches on the outside half of the plate. The Elias Sports Bureau reports that Buehrle spent less than thirty seconds in retiring eight batters that he faced and spent just two minutes and thirty seconds on only two batters that he faced. Put another way, Buehrle dominated a hot Tampa Bay Rays team that ranks third in the American League in batting average and runs. Almost forgotten in Buehrle’s performance was the fact that the White Sox won, with John Fields plating a grand slam.

“I never thought I’d throw a no-hitter, never thought I’d throw a perfect game and I never thought I’d hit a home run,” Buehrle said. “Never say never in this game because crazy stuff can happen.” Buehrle threw his first no hitter against the Texas Rangers in 2007 and hit a home run against the Brewers in June. Buehrle’s first no hitter against the Rangers was nearly a perfect game: in April of 2007 he pitched to 27 Rangers, but walked Sammy Sosa, whom he then picked off. “I can’t believe I did it,” Buehrle said at the time. “Perfect game would have been nice, too.” Oddly, the 2007 Texas game registered the same game time as the perfect game Buehrle pitched on Thursday — two hours and three minutes. But Thursday’s perfecto would not have registered as “perfect” (or even a no hitter or shutout) if it had not been for Dewayne Wise’s ninth inning over-the-fence grab of a  Gabe Kapler drive. Randy Johnson, then with the Arizona Diamondbacks, pitched the last MLB perfect game, on May 18 2004.

There has been one other perfect game thrown by a White Sox pitcher. On April 30, 1922, slow curveball specialist Charlie Robertson blanked the Detroit Tigers, 2-1, in Detroit. Robertson was the fifth major league pitcher to throw a perfect game and the first to throw one on the road. The Tigers complained to umpires that Robertson, an otherwise ineffective pitcher (he never won more games than he lost) doctored the ball while on the mound. Tiger players insisted on submitting several game balls to the major league front office after Robertson’s masterpiece, claiming they showed evidence of tampering — but the charges were never proved. The Tigers, like the Rays, had a powerful line-up, which included Ty Cobb and Harry Heilman (an outfielder-first baseman and lifetime .342 hitter). Robertson pitched his perfect game in Tiger Stadium (then Navin Field) before it was enclosed by outfield bleachers, with fans along the outfield grass roped off from the field of play. This led to a number of disputed calls, which went in Robertson’s favor. Robertson’s arm was never the same after he threw his perfect game, though he went on to pitch another seven years in the majors. Robertson died in his native Texas at the age of 88.

Pale Hose fireballer Mark Buehrle pitched major league baseball’s eighteenth perfect game this afternoon, beating the heavy hitting Tampa Bay Rays 5-0. Buehrle pitched a flyball masterpiece.